Thursday, June 12, 2014

three months and a stolen heart

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The first week of June was my last week with my two and three year old lovies. 

Every June, so I'm told, our preschool & after school program goes through a transition period. Teachers get moved to new rooms, classes combine for the summertime, and students move up. A lot has been up in the air about our June changes, so we've all been experiencing this sitting on pins and needles feeling. As one of the more recently hired teachers, I found out in mid May that I get to move classrooms. It has had me both nervous and excited. Even if I were to stay in my current classroom, the kids are being moved around. Knowing that the twos/threes class won't be the same has helped me adjust to the idea, because I would hate to leave my class if those same kids were staying. 

Because I love those kiddos. They stole my heart, in three months. I love arriving and hearing the squeals of my name ("Ebbaknee!"). I love snuggles and wet kisses and kids who lean on my knees when I'm squatting to their level. I love answering fake phones they hand me. I love daily beauty parlor dates with my two girls. I love playing dinosaur with my boys. I love throwing dance parties every week and teaching them to twirl and boogey. 

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I love how much I fell in love with the one thing I said I would never do, which is teach kids. I didn't want to do what so many in my family have done- teach. Yet I had no idea how much I desired it, how much I needed it, how I dreamt of it, until Jesus gave me the opportunity to do so. I love how Jesus knows our souls and our gifts and our passions so well. I love how He allows those to collide into a job. 

Lord knows I have moments where I stink at my job. There is no perfect teacher, but there are grace giving kids. The word 'teacher' is such an oxy moron; you, as the adult, are supposed to be the one teaching the children, yet they are the ones who teach us adults. Maybe that is why I will miss this group of kids so much, because they have taught me so much about life. In three months. That is insane to me. 

I know I will fall insanely in love with my four year olds. They will teach me entirely new things, that I look forward to learning. But for now, I will grieve my babies moving on up & me, too.  

xo, bethany 

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